Being Brigid’s Dad: A Pediatrician’s Perspective on Down Syndrome

Frank McGehee, M.D., a pediatrician at Cook Children’s Pediatrics Magnolia, says he almost missed the best thing that has ever happened to him: becoming stepfather to Brigid Conders, who has Down syndrome. He can’t imagine the past 24 years without watching Brigid and her grandfather as best buddies, enjoying the countless hugs, seeing her strong faith in Jesus, learning all the rules of baseball, grabbing Starbucks pink drinks every Friday and treasuring the many lessons she has taught him.

As a pediatrician at Cook Children’s for 33 years, Dr. McGehee has cared for more than 200 patients with Down syndrome, bringing a parent’s perspective to the families who walk through his office doors. 

A Father’s Love and a Team’s Support
Dr. McGehee’s introduction to life with Brigid began with her mother, Pam. Initially hesitant about parenting a child with special needs, Dr. McGehee feels blessed every time he hears Brigid call him “Dad.”

Brigid experienced severe seizures as an infant and toddler. When Dr. McGehee became part of her life, she was sleeping in a big-girl bed, walking and potty training. Her progress came on her own timeline, supported by her pediatrician, Ann Natterer, M.D., who listened closely and spoke directly to Brigid.

Dr. McGehee says Warren Marks, M.D. is one of his heroes. He helped manage Brigid’s seizures and fear of the unknown during her medical journey. When Dr. Marks retired, Brigid spotted him among hundreds of people at his retirement party and gave him a huge hug. For Dr. McGehee, moments like that capture the meaningful relationships that have shaped her life.

A School Founded on Brigid’s Progress and Promise
Brigid’s influence extends beyond Dr. McGehee’s medical practice. In 2014, he and Pam founded Our Mother of Perpetual Help Educational Program in Fort Worth. The program educates students with intellectual and developmental disabilities in a one-room schoolhouse equipped with a turf soccer field and pickleball court. 

The inspiration came from Brigid’s progress with her homeschool teacher, Natalie Lewis, who began working with her in 2011. Within a few months, Brigid was making strides in reading, speech, math and social skills. The McGehees wanted other students to benefit from the same teaching methods and other teachers to have the opportunity to learn from Lewis’ approach. Brigid still attends the program every day, and Dr. McGehee hopes one day she will become a teacher’s aide there.

Lessons Learned
Dr. McGehee’s practice has come full circle as he frequently cares for patients whose parents were once his pediatric patients. He has learned how much it matters to listen, celebrate progress and give each patient time to be heard. Brigid, who recently turned 30, continues to reinforce those lessons.

“Children with Down syndrome need love and attention like any other child,” Dr. McGehee said. “I always tell parents that no one knows your child like you do. Listening and joint decision-making between the parent and doctor is very important. I have learned to be humble in what I don’t know and to listen to the parents.”

Among those lessons is that children with Down syndrome are typically sensitive to medications, which can affect their mood and anxiety levels. Going slow is key. He also realized that they need more time to process new challenges. When Brigid broke her foot a few months ago, she thought “broken” meant “permanent” and became very upset until she realized the injury was temporary. Taking time to teach in a language makes all the difference, Dr. McGehee noted.

The Biggest Blessing
Dr. McGehee hopes parents realize from the beginning that raising a child with Down syndrome is a blessing. He describes Brigid as hilarious, loving and deeply faithful.

One of the biggest gifts is the relationship between Brigid and Dr. McGehee’s 93-year-old father-in-law. 

“They help each other. He is Brigid’s butler and helps her get ready every day. She is very loving with him,” Dr. McGehee said. “I’ll never forget a moment when the two of them locked arms after my father-in-law’s doctor appointment.”

Reflecting on the long waiting list of children with Down syndrome awaiting adoption, Dr. McGehee added, “I had a chance to miss the best thing that happened in my life.”