A subtle strength takes root.

It’s found in every supportive smile

And every brave pursuit.

It’s the anchor guiding the way,

A heart so proud and true—

The hope at Cook Children’s

Starts with fathers like you.

This Father’s Day weekend, Cook Children’s celebrated the incredible dads, father figures, and caregivers who bring strength and hope to patients every single day. Festivities span the entire health care system, bringing families together for meaningful quality time at medical center campuses in Prosper and Fort Worth. 

At the medical center in Fort Worth, the system's tiniest treasures celebrated their very first Father’s Day with their families in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). Across town at the Prosper campus, families gathered in the atrium to create handcrafted picture frames, unique artwork, and lasting memories.

Three-year-old Rylee McLemore and his dad Steven do everything together. Fishing, driving in the Jeep and exploring outdoors are just a few of their favorite pastimes.

“Rylee is a daddy’s boy,” Steven said. “He is my best friend and I’m his anchor.”

Everything changed in October 2021 when Rylee began experiencing fever, fatigue, bruising and a lack of appetite. The family was living in California where doctors assured them it was a viral infection. But two days before his second birthday, Rylee’s mom Amber took him to the Emergency Department because he had stopped walking. Bloodwork revealed acute lymphoblastic leukemia. Rylee’s bubbly personality and constant laughter instantly disappeared as he was in pain.

“It was like all the life in him was gone,” Steven said. “He just wasn’t the same child and hurt all the time.”

Rylee’s parents were determined to find the best hospital to treat him. The oncologist who diagnosed him in California referred him to Cook Children’s and on Rylee’s second birthday, the family flew to Fort Worth.

A couple of weeks after diagnosis, Rylee’s hair started falling out and he would need his first haircut. Steven was working out of state at the time, but this was a milestone he was not going to miss.

“I got there as soon as I could,” Steven said. “Rylee had pretty red hair and I didn’t want him to be scared with everything going on. I decided to get a haircut with him.”

The father-son duo got haircuts together in Rylee’s inpatient room on the Oncology floor – a moment Steven will always remember. The haircuts are just one example of the many ways they have felt supported at the hospital every step of the way.

“We love it at Cook Children’s,” Amber said. “The doctors and nurses are absolutely amazing. I wouldn’t choose any other place.”

Within four weeks of treatment, Rylee went into remission. He is now back to his spunky self and set to finish the 2 ½ year treatment protocol in February. Amber says she had always worried about her husband and son having a close relationship because Steven worked on the road for the first 10 months of Rylee’s life and only saw him once a month.

“It’s amazing to see how close they are,” Amber said. “Rylee always wants to be with his daddy. They really are best friends.”

This year’s celebration of Juneteenth falls on Father’s Day – an occurrence that won’t happen again until 2033, 2044 and 2050.

For many of us, June 19 will be a day of celebration; however, for numerous others, including me, it will be a time of reflection. 

I will think about my father, Clement Washington, who was the calming influence in our family. My mother was a character, full of vim and vigor. 

My dad, on the other hand, was the quiet authority figure in my house. He didn’t say a lot, but when he did speak, we knew we’d better listen. 

I miss my father and think about him almost daily. My relationship with him is complicated. I love my father with all my heart and think about how he shaped the person I am today.

I reflect on Juneteenth in much the same way. The day represents sufferings that have helped to shape the state and the nation we are today.

A little history

June 19 certainly reminds us of Texas’s and our country’s grim past in race relations. Juneteenth also prompts us to see how far we’ve come and that there is still work to do.

Juneteenth celebrates the declared liberation of the last remaining slaves of the Confederate States of America. June 19, 1865 in Galveston, Texas, there were still slaves two and a half years after President Abraham Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation went into effect Jan. 1, 1863.

Even after Confederate General Robert E. Lee surrendered April 9, 1865, slaves remained in Texas. It was still two months later – June 19, 1865 – when Union Army General Gordon Granger finally proclaimed General Order No. 3 and declared, “All slaves are free.”

The freedmen were advised to “remain quietly at their present homes and work for wages.”

As Michael Davis wrote in the National Archive News, “While the order was critical to expanding freedom to enslaved people, the racist language used in the last sentences foreshadowed that the fight for equal rights would continue.”

The one and only Opal Lee

I want to thank the noble fighters and my fellow PR professionals across the country who continue to do good work to bring attention to Black people’s struggles and triumphs throughout our nation’s history. I especially want to recognize the “grandmother of Juneteenth,” Fort Worth’s own Opal Lee.

Ms. Opal walked from Fort Worth to Washington D.C. to draw attention to the true meaning of Juneteenth. Opal’s advocacy paid off in 2021 when June 19 was designated a federal holiday.

I am so proud of Opal Lee and everyone who worked determinedly for us to understand the significance of this date for Texans and for Americans.

I will take this Father’s Day to reflect on my own father and all fathers who were finally declared “freedmen.” They clothed themselves in dignity when so many tried to strip them of their liberties. Happy Father's Day everyone and Happy Juneteenth.

Dr. McGehee, seen here with his daughter Brigid, became a stepfather of two younger girls 15 years ago, after his own four children were nearly grown and out of the house. He feels like the commitment he keeps to his wife, Pam, is what makes him a better father of a strong family.

“I know, to some, it sounds like it defies common sense to say put the children second,” Dr. McGehee said. “But, I think you have to have a strong marriage and a strong bond between the husband and wife. From there, everything grows from the love in that relationship. If the marriage is solid, the kids will benefit.”

That strong relationship between spouses will also be needed, Dr. McGehee said, with the extra challenges that come from being a stepparent.

Children of divorce often have emotional issues, sometimes of abandonment and sometimes of anger against the new father. Dr. McGehee said the parents need to have a unified front in dealing with their kids.

“You have to eventually find that place where you trust the stepparent and their objectivity,” Dr. McGehee said. “The stepparent can look at things with fresh eyes and without some of the emotional entanglement that may be there with the biological parent and the children. Hopefully, the biological parent will find that objectivity helpful.”

And then there’s one more relationship that Dr. McGehee feels stepdad has to at least attempt to make – with the biological dad.

“We have something in common – the relationship with the kids,” Dr. McGehee said. “I would hope that we are both trying to love and nurture the child. You have to try to get along with each other, eventually you will have things like graduation and weddings to attend together. You may not ever be friends, but you should at least be colleagues in raising a child. All the parents involved should have the same goals for the child – making them a happy, healthy and successful person.”

I don’t mean a new shirt or an electric screwdriver. I mean the intangibles, the things I experience and learn. As a dad of children with special medical needs, I’ve learned not to be afraid of the next “new normal,” whatever that may be.

Our 7-year-old boys, William and John-Raven, are identical twins with a unique form of muscular dystrophy. As identical twins, they inherited the same genetic variations, so their neurological development has been almost the same as well. They are non-verbal, non-mobile and tube fed. To go into the boys’ full history would take much more than a blog entry, but suffice it to say, they’ve logged quite a few surgeries and hospital stays in their short lives. In the last nine months alone, we’ve spent almost 90 days inpatient at Cook Children’s. I’m writing this from William’s room right now, actually, having been here over a month. During this stay, William got a tracheostomy, so we’re getting thoroughly educated on the ins and outs (literally) of trach care.

From before the boys were born, we’ve had to learn to adapt to new developments that most parents don’t encounter. The kinds of things that mean you have to shuffle significant parts of your life (both emotional and physical) to make room for new day-to-day processes and situations. From the very first sonogram, when we found out we were having twins and that they might be monoamniotic (sharing the same amniotic sac, which is risky for the fetuses), we learned not to get too comfortable. As it turned out, they weren’t monoamniotic, but they did have hydrocephalus (excessive fluid buildup in the brain).

They received shunts shortly after being born to treat the fluid buildup in their brains. They were hospitalized with aspiration pneumonia and received feeding tubes a year later. In the coming years, more things would change. They had corrective eye surgeries. They had their tonsils and adenoids removed. They contracted RSV and went to the Cook Children’s PICU, where both boys had to be intubated, and John-Raven spent several days on life support. Eventually, we received the genetic results that informed us our boys have muscular dystrophy. We’ve had to make numerous 911 calls and taken quite a few ambulance rides. These experiences have taught us to keep ourselves always prepared for a “new normal.”

I take an active role in the care of my kids, and that applies equally to when they’re home and relatively healthy as it does to when they’re at the medical center. For that reason, I am a big fan of the family-centered care approach at Cook Children’s.

I appreciate the way the professionals here involve me in the decisions that are made about the plan of care for my children. I wouldn’t have it any other way. With all of our stays, Cook Children’s has basically been our home-away-from-home. Certainly, we wish our boys did not have to be hospitalized so frequently and for such prolonged periods, but if they have to be, Cook Children’s is our preference. Being in a familiar place with people we trust helps us deal with the challenges that occur so often for a family like ours.

I’m also a member of one of the Family Advisory Councils, and in that role, I get to be more directly involved and improve the connections between the medical center and the families served by it. I think of that as my opportunity to give back and participate in a different way as a parent-partner at the hospital.

I think of Father’s Day as a time to celebrate the joys and opportunities and adventures I’ve had as a father, even the things that are difficult. Thanks to the guidance of the professionals in the Transitional Care Unit, my wife and I have finished our tracheostomy training so that we’ll be better prepared to care for William and his recently acquired trach. It’s just a matter of time before we’re back home again and adapting to our new situation. It isn’t easy, but to me, being a father means celebrating the little wins and making sure I’m ready for the next new normal, regardless of what that is.

About the author

Matthew Plummer Cobb is the father of two identical twins, William and John-Raven, and a member of one of Cook Children's Family Advisory Councils.