We’ve been through so much already in her young life and many of you reading this have followed her story since her birth. I thought this would be a good time to provide an update. “So, how is Avery doing?” A question my husband, Shawn, and I get on a daily basis and we’re often not sure how to answer. Avery is doing well and is a very happy and easy-going baby. She is still on oxygen and will be for a while. And she still eats primarily through her G-button (feeding tube). She continues to make progress but at her own pace. Some people take baby steps; we take micro preemie steps.

One of the hardest parts about being home is that we no longer have a medical team that monitors her daily. I got so used to asking her nurses, therapists and doctors about what was considered “normal” for micro preemies and what wasn’t. Now it’s our job to decide whether something is worth calling a doctor about.

As time goes on and we continue to deal with new issues related to her prematurity, I am developing new coping mechanisms. Some are more productive than others. One has to do with planning her first birthday party.

As I began thinking about her first birthday, it became an obsession for me to create a perfect “Pinterest” worthy birthday party. For those who know me, this is laughable. I’ve never been one who has the patience to attempt anything like most of the “crafty” things you see on Pinterest. But it became my mission. After coming home several nights in a row to me “crafting,” I think Shawn was starting to worry about me!

After thinking about it one night (while crafting), I realized it was my on-going guilt manifesting itself in a new way. Maybe she would look back to pictures of that day and not blame me for her early entry into the world because of how fabulous the birthday party was. If I could make things pretty like a picture then it would fix everything else. I think it comes down to the fact that this was something tangible that I could control whereas I can’t control how quickly she gets better.

In thinking about other ways to celebrate Avery’s birthday, we also decided to do something special to give back to the place that saved Avery’s life – the Cook Children’s NICU. Plain and simple, without the NICU, we wouldn’t have a birthday to celebrate. And so, our family made a donation to the NICU that allows us to have a plaque with Avery’s name on it outside of her room. We used to joke that she deserved a plaque outside that room because she stayed there so long. Now, thanks to my very generous parents, she has one. It’s my hope that her story will inspire and provide hope for others who come to stay in that room.

And so, while I can’t control how quickly Avery gets better, I can control how I use our experience to others who have similar journeys. Thank you all for following Avery on her’s.

Avery's Journey:

• Avery's journey - part 1
• Avery's journey - part 2
• Avery's journey - part 3
• Avery's journey - part 4
• Avery's journey - part 5
• Avery's journey - part 6
• Avery's journey - part 7
• Avery's journey - part 8
• Avery's journey - part 9

For the last 234 days, the Cook Children’s NICU had been our home and the nurses and doctors had become our family. I couldn’t believe that after all this time they actually trusted US to take Avery home and take care of her all by ourselves. I wasn’t sure we were ready.

Well, it turns out, we were ready. Have there been times when I secretly wanted to be back in the NICU, “co-parenting” alongside nurses and doctors who all have much more experience in taking care of babies like Avery than we do? Absolutely! But, we powered through the first few scary and lonely days and nights and are slowly getting into a groove. We are finally those sleep deprived parents we longed to be for so long. I spend most days with no makeup and covered in spit up and I’ve never been happier in my entire life.

Perhaps the hardest part about being home with Avery is the realization that this journey isn’t over and her early entry into this world will continue to make things hard for her over the next few years. It’s not as if something magical happened when we drove away from Cook Children’s to erase her medical history of the past 7 and a half months.

We have many doctors’ visits in our future. We have weekly in-home visits from nurses and physical and occupational therapists. And we are still on oxygen and have a G button. But, we’re home and Avery is doing great! I’ve had to throw out all the old preconceived ideas I had about being a mom and accept that this is what’s it’s like to be Avery’s mom.

As we look forward to celebrating our first Thanksgiving at home as a family, there are so many things to be thankful for. Being in the NICU for so long taught us to be thankful for the little things. For example, we’ve celebrated so many firsts since being home: Avery’s first car ride, bath, walk in the park, even something as mundane as her first trip to the pediatrician didn’t go unnoticed or unrecognized.

I’ve said it before and I’ll continue to say it, this has been the hardest thing I’ve ever had to go through in my life, but I wouldn’t change it for the world because it has made me a better person. It has made me Avery strong.

Avery, Shawn and I want to wish everyone a very happy Thanksgiving! We are so grateful to everyone who has followed our journey and been so supportive of us. Whether we know you personally or you’ve just followed our blogs to keep up with Avery’s progress, it is just so incredible to know of the many people we’ve had cheering us on. Hopefully, we’ve made you Avery strong as well!

Avery's Journey:

• Avery's story - part 1
• Avery's story - part 2
• Avery's story - part 3
• Avery's story - part 4
• Avery's story - part 5
• Avery's journey - part 6
• Avery's journey - part 7
• Avery's journey - part 8

Avery's Journey:

• Avery's story - part 1
• Avery's story - part 2
• Avery's story - part 3
• Avery's story - part 4
• Avery's story - part 5
• Avery's journey - part 6
• Avery's journey - part 7

Her day begins bright and early around 7 a.m. with cuddles from Mommy and then it’s time for her bottle feeding at 8. Other activities for the morning include a visit from the respiratory therapist (RT) for her breathing treatment and morning “massage.” Her “massage” is part of her chest physiotherapy where they use an oxygen mask to firmly pat her on her chest and back to help expand her lungs and break up any mucus she may have. This is one of Avery’s favorite parts of the day. We love to watch her as she lies in her bed on her stomach and dozes off to sleep as the RTs work their magic.

She may also get a visit from occupational or physical therapy for a morning workout where they work on fun things like learning to put her feet in her mouth and building her core strength to help her learn to roll over and sit up. They also have taught us about infant massage and given us stretches we can do with Avery to help her with her flexibility.

After her morning workout, she has likely worked up an appetite so it’s time to eat again. This time, a speech pathologist may come to give Avery her bottle. Learning to eat after 6 months is tough, so a speech pathologist is working with us on what bottles and nipples to use, positions to try when feeding her and different combinations of breast milk and formula to use. All of these things play an important factor in helping Avery to swallow efficiently and effectively and not having her food go down the “wrong way” which can cause aspiration and an infection in her lungs. We are about to introduce her to solid foods which will be another fun adventure!

Once she’s done eating, it’s usually time for a visit from Daddy, where she likes to squeeze in her afternoon nap on his lap. All the activity from the morning often wears her out for a few hours. She is, after all, a baby who needs her rest so she can grow healthy, new lung tissue.

In the afternoon, she may get a visit from the Child Life specialist for some “smile therapy” where we work on coaxing a smile out of her or arts and crafts activities with her footprints. The music therapist may come by to sing and play music while Avery works on her babbling.

Interspersed throughout this busy day of therapy visits, eating, naps and playtime, she also receives countless visits from the NICU staff and our family, all stopping by to see her outfit of the day and get an update on how she’s doing.

The late afternoon and early evening is reserved for family time where she plays on her play mat, works on tummy time or hangs out in her Bumbo® or exersaucer. By the time Shawn and I are ready to go home and sleep, Avery is usually asleep, worn out from all of the day’s activities. After all, she has to get a good night sleep so she can wake up and do it all over again the next day.

Related links:

• Avery's story - part 1
• Avery's story - part 2
• Avery's story - part 3
• Avery's story - part 4
• Avery's story - part 5
• Avery's journey - part 6