Kids Share Their Thoughts On Love
A nationwide survey takes place every year during Valentine's Day
Valentine’s Day can be stressful even for couples who have been together for years, much less kids.
Every Valentine’s Day, KidsHealth asks kids questions about love. The more than 4,300 participants of the survey said they feel uncomfortable when:
- Getting a phone call, email or note from someone who likes you.
- Admitting that you like someone and finding out he or she only likes you as a friend.
- Getting turned down after asking someone to dance.
- Talking on the phone to someone you like and having your mom pick up the phone.
- Hearing false rumors that you like someone or when people talk about how you like a certain person.
About 80 percent of the kids say they had a crush one someone. Some were more prone to keep things quiet, with 40 percent saying they like to keep their feelings to themselves. And when the other 60 percent decided to share their feelings with others, they admitted it could lead to problems.
"I was so embarrassed that I hid in the washroom for most of the day!" one girl said after finding out a boy had started rumors that they were an item.
Kids who participated in the survey offer the following tips to avoid embarrassment:
- Try not to make fun of others or spread rumors about who likes whom. (It's tough to avoid, but remember how it feels when it happens to you.)
- If someone says they like you, but you don't like them, try to tell them in a kind way.
- If you like someone, consider that person's feelings. It's great if the person likes you back. But if your attention makes the person feel uncomfortable or angry, try to back off.
- Talk to a parent or a trusted adult if you need help or advice.
That embarrassment and the crushes that go along with them are all perfectly normal and part of growing up.
“I certainly think elementary age kids can ‘like’ others and have what they think is a crush,” said Joy Crabtree, Psy.D., a licensed psychologist for Southlake Urgent Care and Pediatric Specialties and Hurst Urgent Care Psychology Clinics. “and by middle school feel the pressure of ‘going out,’ etc. but by high school it’s full on and everything turns into a big deal.”
For moms and dads, you can expect more drama as your kids get older. But you knew that already. After all, you were a kid too.
“I think at every age it’s important to stress balance and moderation in relationships and friendships,” Crabtree said. “But for Valentine’s Day at younger ages, stress to your kids it’s more about showing love for your family and appreciation for your friends."
- Read more about the survey here.
- Teens Talk Love
- Your Thoughts on Falling In Love
- Love and Romance
- Sexual Attraction and Orientation